After reading “The Year of Yes,” I decided to try it for myself. The results were so positive that I’ve kept up a slightly modified effort nearly a decade longer!
It seems every time I open LinkedIn or a business publication, I see an article or post espousing the benefits of saying “no.” Saying “yes” would appear to be the cause of corporate downfalls everywhere if you believe these authors! The Yes Paradox refers to the dilemma that saying “yes” opens you to opportunities, growth, and connection, but saying “yes” too often or indiscriminately leads to overwhelm, burnout, and diluted focus, while saying “no” protects your time but risks missing out on opportunities.
Consider Shonda Rhymes, an incredibly successful television producer and her Year of Yes. Shonda’s story began with a Thanksgiving sibling conversation – when challenged by her sister that Shonda said no to most opportunities sent her way, she decided to prove she could say yes to everything for a full year.
The result would shock all those business writers! Shonda’s success skyrocketed, and the extra demands on her schedule paled in comparison.
So, what is the right path? Is it yes or no?
My path to opportunity has been an adaptation of her process – to say “yes, and” or “yes, but.”
Yes, and
Where have you heard that before? It’s the central concept underlying successful improvisation performers’ practice. The process requires each performer to say yes to their partner first, then they expand on whatever their collaborator has suggested. A classic example is:
• Person 1 (Offer): “Oh gosh, look at that, an angry Viking coming toward us!”
• Person 2 (Yes, and…): “Yes, and he’s brought his pet dragon with him!”
• Person 1 (Yes, and…): “Yes, and the dragon looks hungry!”
• Person 2 (Yes, and…): “Yes, and we are trapped in this boat with no motor!”
I’ve done improv training for business as part of two different Fortune 500 companies seeking to enhance communication within departments or functions. It really works! A proposal that might have been denied previously gets a second chance because a colleague feels comfortable accepting your idea by adding their own spin to it.
But…what about those terrible ideas, you ask? Or are there truly no bad ideas when brainstorming?
The secret to saying yes to everything is that “yes, but” allows you to acknowledge the challenges in a “bad idea” without shutting it down completely. A former colleague was known as “Dr. No” for their nearly automated negative response to new ideas. When we were assigned the first of many projects together, I suggested a rule that all proposals either of us received would get either “yes, and” or “yes, but” as the response. The affirmative required amplification; the negative, the solution (regardless of how extreme).
One of the first proposals we received asked for additional plant capacity, which would require an unbudgeted seven-figure investment. Dr. No’s previous default response would’ve been a quick “NO!” But in our new arrangement, the reply was, “Yes, we can do that, but I need your help getting an incremental $1.5M approved from leadership.”
The Yes Paradox, Personalized
After reading “The Year of Yes,” I decided to try it for myself. The results were so positive that I’ve kept up a slightly modified effort nearly a decade longer! I would not be writing this column without it, in fact.
While it’s true that I’ve taken on several projects or tasks that have been either unsuccessful or time-consuming, those have been in the minority. By qualifying my responses as “yes, but” I’m forced to think the answer through fully. In fact, I must think it through thoroughly enough to offer a solution in the response. “Yes, but it will cost a million dollars,” starts a dialogue with a colleague rather than shutting them out. “Yes, but it will take two years” keeps a discussion about a phased execution in play.
The biggest success that’s come from this almost decade of yes isn’t in those projects. It’s in the opportunities that come as a result of the extended conversation. “Yes, I will come to speak to your class, but I can’t until next week” transforms into “hey would you like to teach?” a year later.
What’s sitting in your inbox right now that you could say yes to? How can you take what might have been a no and transform it? Where could the conversation go from there? I’d love to talk about it with you!
Charley Orwig, MBA
Senior Strategy and Brand Marketing Advisor
Charley is a dynamic business leader and marketing executive with 20 years of experience driving business growth. He combines solid corporate and agency experience, creative aptitude and sharp market insight, B2B and B2C experience as well as expertise in diverse digital markets. Charley spent much of his career in Brand Management at Kraft, before taking on consulting and leadership roles in marketing and data science. Having consistently delivered accelerated revenue growth for many of the top consumer brands, Charley understands what it takes to drive organizational performance, and how to build teams that are capable of consistently delivering it. Charley holds a BS in Communication from Bradley University and an MBA from Benedictine University and holds certifications in Appreciative Inquiry and Ecommerce Analytics. Charley is a marketing instructor in Northwestern’s Kellogg Executive Education program and holds faculty positions at Lake Forest Graduate School of Management and Benedictine University, where he teaches courses in graduate and undergraduate marketing and communications. Charley resides in the Chicago area with his family. He is an active volunteer in his community, a youth basketball coach, and will happily hop on a bike any chance he gets.